The Coin Theory.

Dreams, according to psychology and psychiatry an imbalance in the brain that projects the subconscious mind or feelings when we are sleep. Philosophers call it the motive of life. Spiritual Gurus call it signs from God. As for me, my definition cannot fit the words so I won’t even try it. Over the years, life has become too much of a competition rather than an experience. I am not against it. I love competition myself. For all those saying, just enjoy the experience and do not run in the rat race, well for those I would say, it’s a rate race when you do not have an ambition or goal, for the ones who ambitions and goals it is the only thing they will live for. This ambition or goal becomes their meditation, their peace and their life path. They are defined by it.

“It is a pathetic feeling when anyone around you does not understand your dreams and do not even relate to them. All they do is either discourage you or laugh at you.”  She was very angry, my friend. Looking at her anyone would think that today she may kill someone. I did not waste time the moment she called me. Over the phone I could deduce that she is very angry and disappointed. So I came by immediately. When I entered her room I could see her very angry and just pacing up and down the room. “Preeti, what has happened? Why did you call me so urgently? Why are you so angry and over what?”  I asked her. I grabbed the chair nearby and sat on it. She looked at me in frustration. “Why can’t the world understand that a person needs to fulfil his or her dreams and they are doing nothing wrong in it, why cannot they have faith in my dreams, my parents? Besides even my friends are advocating the idea of giving up my dream. Why is it so difficult for them to understand?”  Ok so now I know that this is nothing new. She was going through the same issue that millions of people are going through especially when it comes to choosing their careers or doing something different in life. I had developed a theory on this many years back and did have a solution to this.

“Do you have your purse around?”  I asked her. “Kunal, I am in no mood to go out right now. If you think that going out for either a coffee or may be a movie would cheer me up, then you are wrong, I am seriously very angry and frustrated right now.” She said. “Dumbo! I don’t need your purse for that just tell me is it around.”

I told her. “Yes there on the table beside you.” I picked up her purse got a coin out of it. She was confused as to what I was doing, but then I am known amongst my friends to do weird experiments to make them understand things. “One problem at a time my friend is how we will do it.” I said. “Now look at the coin carefully, just the side facing you and do not think of the side facing me. What do you see?” I said. “I see the engravings of Rupees 2 on it, along with the year and other stuff.” “Good, now what if I say it’s not a 2 rupee coin and it’s a 5 rupee coin.” I asked her. “Then I would say you have lost it. I can clearly see it’s a 2 rupee coin.” She said. “Exactly, I cannot see the side you are seeing so I could be wrong about the coin, but you see it so you are right. People, your parents, friends and relatives do not see your side of the dream hence they could be wrong about your dream, but only you see your side of the dream so you are right about it. This is the reason why people do not understand or support your dream because they haven’t seen the other side. But again, you haven’t seen their side of the coin and hence you feel no one understands you, everyone is against you. The point is you have to see both the sides. Only then, it could be balanced.” She now understood what I meant to say. “But Kunal what if I see the other side and come to know that my dream was wrong and their analysis was right.”  She asked. “Well, do you see the dream as closely as this coin? Is it as real for you as this coin? Can you feel it?” I asked. “Yes.” She said. “Then my friend how can you be wrong. The coin is of 2 rupees. Your dream is not wrong. Your dream is not unachievable if you see it this close. There two kinds of dreams realistic and unrealistic. If you say I will be king one day and do nothing about it that is an unrealistic dream. If you have such a dream I would say it is stupid to dream of becoming a king. If you say I dream to becoming a king by working in this manner or working hard or doing this business or conquering that land with my efforts, then I would say it is a dream which is actually a reality of the future, that dream is achievable. So first ask yourself which kind of dream are you carrying on your shoulders, if you are carrying the correct one then it would be real fun to fight the world for it. Make sure the coin is of 2 rupees my friend before fighting.” She had calmed down now. She slowly understood my point. “But Kunal what if even after understanding their point of view, they still don’t understand mine. Shall I give up on the dream or shall I give up on them.”  She asked. “Will you be able to buy anything with this coin if I just give you one side of it? Will it be still valuable?” I asked. “No.” She replied. “Exactly, a dream has to be nurtured by both sides. Both sides are equally important.  You should not give up on your dream or either on your people. Remember, this isn’t a movie where you walk away all alone to achieve something. It is real life my friend and here man is a social animal. No dream will ever come true without taking help or taking guidance. Efforts would be put by you but your dream would be achieved by you, with your parents and friends as a team. Team work always pays off. Tell me why do you see the denomination of the coin so clearly?”  I asked. “It is too close to my eyes.” She said. “That is what you have to do, take the dream close to their eyes for them to see it as clearly as you see it. Involve them in your decisions rather than excluding them. Make them feel what you feel, make them experience your dream through your eyes and in turn see their side from their eyes.” “I guess you are right. It is not that difficult. Even if it is, it’s worth a try, and yes, as you always keep quoting ‘Never be the slave of your destiny, make your destiny your slave.’ I would do that. But Kunal I would need your help. Tell me are you on my side?”  She asked. I smiled, “Look closely what am I doing?” I asked. “You are holding the coin for me.” She smiled. She hugged me. “Remember we learnt in Economics at school that human wants are unlimited.” I asked. “Yes.” She said. “My friend if you lose a dream or do not achieve it do not give up never be disheartened. Remember just like human wants, human dreams are also unlimited. So if one dream shatters, cry it out, have your dinner, go to sleep, and I promise you the next morning a new dream will be waiting for you to take you on a new adventure in life.”  “You never give up do you Kunal” “Never ever in my life.” 

Do not give up on your dreams remember to see the coin clearly and bring it closer to ones who want to see it clearly and dreams will be achieved.  This goes out to all my teenage readers who are now entering into their college days. All the best and do your best. Have faith first in self and then in God remember he is holding the coin for all of us.